Over 6 years ago, I married a preacher man. Just a young girl, at 18, with lots of baggage. But, as a young adult, I had just made the decision to dedicate my life to Christ a few years before we had gotten together.
Christianity wasn't foreign to me, we attended not so faithfully all my life. But I knew what was expected out of most preachers wives. I knew most of them sang, played an instrument, and were a great help to their husbands in the ministry because of it.
Growing up in church, I watched women I had such great respect for being that helpmeet to their husbands in ministry.
And as that young wife who had no talent in song or music, the longer that I was married to that preacher man of mine, the more inadequate I felt.
About a year after we had Johannah and nearly three years after we had gotten married, I attended a conference held by our fellowship. I was without Christopher because he had to work.
I stayed up late one night talking with some friends that had been married and in the ministry for years. I don't remember everything we talked about, but I remember sharing with them how inadequate I felt as a young wife in the ministry.
In the presence of people I looked up to so much, I sat broken and poured my heart out to them.
I couldn't support my husband with music or in song and I was lost as to where my place was. I had no problem standing behind my husband as he led us, but how could I be that helpmeet to him that he deserved, that I so longed to be.
That lady that could easily lead the Heavenly choir looked at me and said: "But you can pray."
I never once considered the blessing I was to my husband by just supporting his calling. The partner in ministry that I was by being available to him in the Lord's work. How being willing to encourage and comfort and pray, I was helping his ministry. By abiding in Christ, and Him in me, being led by His spirit, I was his helpmeet.
My prayer has always been, "Not to be seen, or heard, or recognized for anything. But that You be seen and lifted up through me." and that's exactly what I feel like was being done. You can pray, the most powerful words for ministry wives.
The more I thought about it, the more I began to think about all the women who had encouraged me throughout my walk with Christ. Those who's calls or texts came at just the right time. The ones that were there when I needed a shoulder to cry on or who I could lean to for advice. The ones who spoke to me sweet words of encouragement from the Lord, or even rebuke that I might not have wanted to hear.
More than the good singer, more than the good musician, I learned that being used by God in any way is good enough for me.
So my sisters in the ministry, find your place in prayer. Don't worry about being someone, or something, but make yourself known to God. Prayer is one thing that doesn't take skill, so you can pray. Be that warrior, that soldier, in prayer. Be led by God.
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